The other day my husband and I were in the supermarket to buy basic food products. Milk, cheese, bread – whatever people normally buy at the supermarket. All of a sudden in aisle 4, my husband stops dead in his tracks and his face lights up. I immediately wondered what could he possibly have seen. Chocolate? No, only my eyes light up when I see chocolate. Beer? Yes, he does get the happy face when he sees beer but this was the wrong aisle. So, I walk back a few steps to where he was standing looking like a kid in candy store. Turns out, there was a huge display of yo-yos in a variety of colors. Yo-yos? Seriously? Yes, seriously.
Husband: “I totally have to get one of these!”
Me: “No, you don’t. It’s just going to collect dust.”
Husband: “No, I’m going to use it every single day. It’s gonna be great! I’ll show you all the tricks I can do!”
Me: “No.”
Husband: “You’re going to think I’m so hot when I show you how I put the yo-yo to sleep.” (Yes, he really said this. I swear, I’m not making this up.)
So, we bought the yo-yo and he couldn’t wait to try out all his great tricks. He put the yo-yo to “sleep” and “walked the dog”. And that was it. Two tricks and he was done. And where do you think the yo-yo has been since that night? Yup, on the shelf collecting dust.
My husband on another one day yo-yo craze, circa 1989
Come on, he has to get points for yo-yoing in front of the Capital.
Not to mention modeling a bitchin’ pair of Sperry Topsiders while yo-yoing.
lmaoo, that sounds just like something my boyfriend would do, its like ♪ have a little brother when in the supermarket with this baffoon
Interesting. I lost a similar argument with my husband over a huge coffee thermos in WalMart yesterday. Like the k ind you use when you go fishing or camping to carry a full pot of coffee with you. Which would make perfect sense if, 1. he drank coffee regularly or 2. he actually ever went fishing or camping.
I gave up and let him buy the thermos after a long struggle of the thermos being put in the cart, being put back on the shelf, and then in the cart again, he paid $23.99 for a thermos I predicted he will never use and will only collect dust next to his tool box he also never uses.
To prove me wrong, he proceeded to sit on the couch with it for the rest of the night while watching TV. I guess the thermos likes to watch Wayne’s World with commercials too.
Ok……..so this is EXACTLY the scenario when my husband begged and pleaded for a harmonica and a DVD to learn how to play the harmonica. He has NEVER opened the DVD yet and I think our 3 year old currently has the harmonica (which he never plays with either).
First off, I love your blog, it is totally hilarious.
My boyfriend recently moved in with me and unpacked a $100 yo-yo. He claimed that he was going to get back into yo-yoing. Two months later and the thing is taking up space in a kitchen drawer.
How about calling this the nagging, trying-to-mother wife? Are you kidding me? How disrespectful……..
You must have heard that men are just big boys? Men and their toys. If you can’t beat them join them, get your own yo-yo and show him how it’s really done. Love the pic!
Scarlett, get a life you have never found anything that someone else does annoying? It would be safe to say I doubt it. Why is it so hard for people to take this in good humor? WHY are people so unhappy in their lives there is no humor? WHY
I love your website. It is absolutely hilarious. I don’t feel so alone. My fiance has been standing in front of a mirror shooting imaginary basketballs for 45 minutes. Whatever. At least he isn’t bothering me!
And this grocery store yo-yo cost all of what, three dollars? Maybe he should blog snarkily about your next ridiculously overpriced cup of Starbucks.
You think he’s annoying now, just wait until he’s your annoying EX-husband. I predict your blog getting its new name in about eighteen months.
Love it! I can’t wait to read your next one. Props to your husband for taking it all in stride, maybe you should buy him a new green sweater as a thanks-for-being-anoying-and-giveing-me-such-great-material kind of gift=)
this blog is hysterical!
Awww, ya’ll — give him a break on the yo-yo thing. I can positively see wifey’s look when hubby saw the yo-yo. I’m sure that it was much like my husband’s look when I found one at a souvenier shop in Bimiji, MN. And not only do I show off my “moves” to hubby and plumb dazzle my grandson, one night the doorbell rang. Believe it or not it was two teen boys on a scavenger hunt … looking for a yo-yo! I was their hero =D
i have to admit, this is something i would do
i did a huge purge of crap i accumulated before college, after college, and last year.
My husband has toys, stuffed animals, 100″s star wars toys, in their orginal boxes, I am having the worlds biggest sale when he dies and am taking a trio to Greece.
Again…..people like Scarlet and tl….SHUT UP.
I don’t recall seeing anything from Mark requesting you come to his rescue. He is a big boy (ok….maybe tall…but anyway) and I’m quite sure that if it was something he didn’t find funny, she wouldn’t post it.
It’s called….intrusive. For those of us who enjoy the blog, you are intruding in our business…..so MIND YOUR OWN!
It’s a free country. Deal.
Posting on a public forum makes it our business. As a woman, I don’t want people under the false impression we’re all nagging bitches or that we’re all low-brow enough to find humor in publicly ridiculing someone you chose to spend your life with.
lol, at the supermarket, without fail, ever time, my husband will disappear for a little while and come back with a dog toy, the same dog toy every time, a dead looking duck that quacks when you squeeze it. He chases me around the store, quaking this thing at me. He wanted to buy it a couple of times, and yeah, if we had a dog, I could see how that would be fun for him to play with the pooch, but, we DON’T have a dog.
My husband has a yo-yo from high school (he is 29 now) that sits in his sock draw collecting dust. He won’t get rid of it even though he rarely uses it and can barely do 1 trick. I don’t really care about it but that is just because I don’t see it everyday.
Jezus Christ havent you girls heard of hobbies? or some things that you did when u was a kid and want to do it again just for the feel of it?
You girls want to feel young all the time, right? Yes after some age it gets kinda odd but still… Woudnt you do something or buy something that will bring you back to your childhood? …
I’ve seen guys (im a guy… obviously) that do srsly retarded stuff… but this one doesnt even come close.
I find it totally amazing that women treat their husbands like little boys. He saw a yo-yo and wanted to buy it and you said, “no”??? It’s a $5 yo-yo, not a motorcycle. How did wives get to be such controlling bitches? No wonder so many husbands cheat!
I did something similar. I bought one of those little balsa wood glider planes that you buy at hardware stores. When I saw it while we were getting some keys made, the nostalgia hit me and I had to get it (the one with the propeller of course). After a few flights on our street, I realized that there is nowhere I could really give it a good throw and not hit either a person, a car, or an apartment. So it had been sitting in our houseplant as a sort of homage to the series “Lost” I guess. I knew it was silly, and I’d do it again.
Come on tl, what’s with all the hate? You jealous or an ex-boyfriend or something.
The fact that you are leaving comments after every story is cracking. me. up.
You look like a fool. But keep going…it’s hilarious.
at least you just got a yo-yo. Try a pull table in the shed ( Its a large one). the tools on top since there is no space to walk around it to put them where they should be.
TOTALLY. My husband bought a harmonica. To “serenade” me. Where does it sit? On the bureau, gathering dust.
We went to a Bastille Day Festival in July. What did he want to buy? Buttons. Where would they have ended up? On the bureau. He restrained himself. I was very proud.
LOL I am squeezing out tears of laughter… I don’t know what’s funnier, the neato high waisted washed denim, (my husband has a too- tight pirate shirt that would go with that) or the Sperrys, or the fact that he has a yoyo…outside…the capitol?! Why, what, who how…….
Or the incredibly righteous people fuming about the disapproved yoyo purchase. You guys just don’t know how hilarious you really are.
OK, we have 25 year old cricket set, weighing approx two metric tons (spare stumps, made from solid wood) in our garage.
It’s not even a ‘proper’ cricket set anymore… the rules have changed in the last quarter century and the sizes are wrong. But it is critical – do you hear, CRITICAL! to our household and must NOT be disturbed, ever.
Apparently.
At least there’s always E-Bay, people
LOL! Husbands are like grown children I love mine for that. He rarely asks for things (whilst at the store), but he BEGS and whines and sighs and bugs the crap outta me until we can leave. I always feel like I’m dragging a small child on a leash around while I’m trying to do my shopping. He hates going to the store….with me anyway.
Its pretty much almost an all out tantrum when I even mention that I need to go to a “girly store” such as ULTA or someplace that doesn’t have man toys.
He’ll ask me some variation of this question almost every time we go shopping BEFORE we even enter the doors”…so you know what you’re getting right? Cuz I don’t wanna be here for 2 hours” …..Sorry I didn’t realize sitting on the couch watching NFL Network was such a pressing matter, that you couldn’t wait until we got back so you could listen to the 5 same things all the OTHER football announcers have already talked about all week….sigh..I digress…
Oh Lord, Mrs Jnr do you get THAT too!?
My guy’s bottom lip slumps if he can’t watch the 6 o’clock news every night…well, he says ‘news’ but he means ‘sports’…but he’s already read the sports section of the newspaper at work and discussed it with work buddies, and had his fix of online sports pages on the PC, and if it’s a weekend, he would have JUST WATCHED THE GAME ANYWAY. I’ve given up saying “But haven’t we just watched this!?…..”
And if it’s reeeaaallly interesting, he can watch the national news reporting of a game whilst checking what the online reporters are saying, all at the same time, if he angles the screens right……
You think that’s bad, try being married to a former yo-yo “champion”, who has easily 50+ yo-yo’s in the house, and gods forbid that I think about getting rid of a single one. To date, he has: knocked himself out – twice (because why use plastic when you can have a nice SB-2 made from aircraft aluminum?!), hit several family members, and when our dog was a pup, broke one of his baby teeth. Yeah, I feel you on the annoyance there.